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Suffice it to say, James had lost his husband.
Another quick sweep of his immediate surroundings confirmed his fears and James frowned deeply as yet another call went unanswered. Regulus had been beside him only minutes ago but now he was nowhere to be found.
When his third call rang until Regulus’ voicemail picked up, his stomach began to turn with uncertainty. What if something happened? No, a ridiculous assumption. Regulus was small but highly capable. If someone had tried to grab him there would have been screaming and vicious kicks aimed at the crotch of his assailant. If that somehow failed, Regulus would have bitten and clawed and used every ounce of strength to cause as big of a scene as possible. And if that failed, Regulus always carried at least three knives on his body.
So, Regulus must have left willingly.
James did vaguely recall Regulus saying something about finding a gift for Christmas. August was maybe a little too early to start holiday shopping but Regulus was nothing if not prepared. He started writing his Christmas lists in May.
Although, Regulus was also careful to keep James informed of his comings and goings. If he decided to wander, he would have told James so he could go and snack on a Greggs pizza slice while staring at the cats through the window of the cat cafe.
Turning in another circle, James sighed.
He would have to do it.
Looking for the right target was easy enough. There was a lone young man sat outside a cafe on one of the tables. Thankfully, he was at one of the ones further away from the other patrons. Now the only problem was getting him on board.
“Excuse me,” James said with an amicable smile.
The man at the table startled and looked up from his book. He really was quite handsome with an array of scars on his face and kind eyes. “Yes?”
“Could you help me find my husband?”
The man blinked. “Er, sure. Where did you last see him?”
James made a vague gesture towards the escalator. “Over there somewhere. Can I sit here?”
“I thought you wanted me to help find your husband,” the man said slowly as James promptly sat opposite him. The metal chair legs shrieked against the tiled floor as James shuffled closer. Unsurprisingly, the man leaned back a little.
“You are.”
The man only appeared more confused, especially when James wriggled until their knees were touching under the table. “Mate, no offence, honestly, but I’m definitely taken and if you really are married—”
“What’s your name?”
The man started to look around desperately. “I really…”
“I’m James.”
Sighing, the man said, “Remus.”
“Lovely to meet you Remus.” James clapped a hand on his shoulder and let his hand settle on his upper arm only to feel the entire table shake when a knife was plunged through Remus’ book and the metal of the table top. “And there he is!”
James and Remus turned in unison to see Regulus standing barely a foot behind them, eyes boring into the hand James still had over Remus’ bicep.
“Ffyc!” Remus hissed. “What the—”
“Be quiet,” Regulus snapped, then those furious eyes settled on him. “Explain.”
James grinned dopily. “Hello, my love.”
“I will stick pins in your eardrums if you do not remove your hand.”
James did as instructed and even gave a jaunty wave. “Thank you, Remus.”
Remus gaped. “For what?”
“Helping me find my husband.”
Remus looked at James, then at Regulus, then at his ruined book.
Sniffing unhappily, Regulus held out his hand. Used to the motion, James passed his wallet over and kept his mouth shut as Regulus rifled through the note slot, retrieving several twenty pound notes. The wallet was tossed carelessly on the table as Regulus held half of the money out to Remus.
“For your book.”
Remus took the money slowly. “And the rest?”
Regulus pocketed the remaining money. James only hid a smile behind his palm, resting his chin against his hand as Regulus continued to glare at the stranger with dead eyes.
What’s mine is yours, he wanted to croon.
“I see.” Remus glanced between them. “This was insane. Good thing I’m used to that.”
“You are?” James perked up.
Regulus made a disgusted noise. “Great. Another person to add to the Christmas mailing list.”
Surprisingly, Remus snorted. “You remind me of my other half. Except, I think he would have held that knife to my throat had he thought I was flirting with another man.”
Regulus slammed his hand on the table. “Flirting?” he hissed, then turned to James. “You were flirting with him?”
“No!” James gasped.
“Why does he think you were flirting with him?” Regulus demanded. “What did you say?” He looked back at Remus. “What did he say?”
Remus’ shoulders shook with amusement. “You are so much like my partner it’s a little uncanny.”
“Why did you say he was flirting?” Regulus ground out.
“I didn’t. I said that’s how my partner would react if he thought I was flirting with someone else. He can be a little possessive —in a cute way.”
Regulus narrowed his eyes. “Did you think my James was flirting with you? Because my James has better taste.”
James shook his head wildly. “Of course he didn’t!”
“At first, yeah,” Remus said, not offended in the slightest by the barb.
James mentally signed away all rights to sleeping in his own bed for a week. He would be lucky if Regulus let him take the sofa. His husband would probably lock him in the shed with nothing but cobwebs to keep him warm.
Regulus’ face went red. “Is that so?”
“Well, he sat right next to me and started acting very strangely so I thought he was either a sleazy flirt or a madman.”
“Sleazy?”
“First thing he said to me was—” James hurriedly gestured for Remus to stop, “—he wanted to find his husband,” James gestured again. “—then he pressed his thigh against mine.” James covered his face with his hands.
Definitely the shed.
Very slowly, Regulus turned to look at him.
James tried for a smile. “Have I told you how beautiful you look today, my beloved?”
“Maybe I should go,” Remus said uncertainly. “I’m sensing I’ve just caused an argument.”
“How refreshingly candid,” Regulus said suddenly. He reached into his pocket and passed his business card to Remus. “Regulus.”
“No, it’s Remus.”
“Imbecile, my name is Regulus.”
“Oh.” Remus’ face went red. “Oh, wow, you’re a vet? I just got a dog with my partner and we’ve been looking for someone reliable.”
“Good for you. Dogs are excellent companions. Book an appointment with my receptionist and I’ll give you a free microchipping for your troubles.”
Remus nodded. “Okay. Er, I’m sorry for being a blabbermouth.”
“It’s alright. Sorry for your book,” James said contritely. “I didn’t know he would do that.” Although, he should have expected it.
“It’s fine, I was re-reading it for my book club and I hate The Alchemist.”
Regulus made a short noise of surprise. “So do I. Utterly pretentious nonsense.”
“Exactly!”
James folded his arms and scowled. He had just lost his husband to another potential best friend. Hopefully this one would be less clingy and obnoxiously flirtatious than the current one.
On second thought, if James wanted to be rid of this interloper, all he needed to do was mention the words ‘new best friend’ to Barty and the flames would fan themselves.
“—isn’t realistic at all. It’s the sort of thing that a seventeen year old would find profound,” Remus was saying as James tuned back into the conversation.
“My thoughts exactly! One of my uncles said it was the best book he’d ever read which didn’t surprise me at all considering he has the sense of humour and intelligence of a teenage boy.”
“Best book he’d ever read?” Remus said incredulously.
“I think it also might have been the only book he ever read.”
Remus snorted in disgust.
James laid his head down on the table.
When Regulus pulled up a chair between them, his hand absentmindedly drifted to settle in James’ hair. James smiled fondly.
Maybe he would get to sleep on the sofa after all.